Weaving practices into the loom of life

As a yoginni of over a decade, I rely on many practices I've established to maintain equanimity. Though, the more practices I have established, the more I notice I do them and then discontinue or shift into other focuses of practice. And over time they all weave together to form the action of my life.

 I have breathing practices I use throughout the day,  some for the morning, some for getting pumped for work, one for relaxation or meditation. I have writing practices I use to record my mind as I study myself/Svadhyaya.  One of the most successful writing practices I established was my journaling project last year. I was to write as often as possible, about once a day. Each day, no matter how hard, I looped the writings back to gratitude as their foundation. It proved to be a sturdy foundation and it shaped my mind. Though old patterns show(ed) up frequently, especially in the absence of practice.

As I added in new practices, naturally some of the others faded away. I completed my last journal and in the new one, I shifted from gratitude to innovation as the interweaving common ground. And I found myself writing much less. And I find myself over the past week angry and, not surprisingly, not so grateful. The beauty of it all is having a mind I observe and practices to come back to or tweak.
This morning, I am pleased to report, my first thoughts were of counting my blessing and expressing gratitude. This morning I have more energy and I am excited to be part of the world. What a relief after weeks of feeling down and pessimistic.

The yoga sutras say, to practice/Abhyasa and to detach/Vairagya. So as a yoginni (and libra) I am balancing the scales between never giving up and constantly letting go.

I'm glad to have the discipline/tapas to implement practices and the self awareness to notice which ones are effective and when to go back. One important note will take away from this is seeing how easily I got down on myself for feeling "negative" thoughts and for struggling. Rather then judge myself so harshly next time, I hope to remember that the threads/Gunas of life will braid, leaving different strings on top and they will require different approach and practices to feel balance and equanimous.

Regardless of how beautiful or challenging a moment is perceived, I pledge to never give up and always let go. With the recent suicide of Robin Williams, more people I think could benefit from practices such as writing, breathing, expressing gratitude to combat fatalistic thoughts. Nothing is permanent. What feels like a big deal and intense, will simmer over time. Letting go of needing things to show up perfectly and never giving up on trying new approaches are crucial to wellness and survival.